Clever Parents Blogs

Barbie's Personal Image Consultant

Dear Carrie: It’s been reported lately, most notably in the Wall Street Journal, that Mattel has had some trouble lately because of slumping sales in its flagship line, Barbie. In order to get the company back on track, Mattel wants to give Barbie a makeover due to lost sales to The Bratz. How would you makeover Barbie, Carrie?

Oh, Barbie. Bless your heart.  It's hard to compete with The Bratz when you're 46.   

I think this is what they call a mid-life crisis.  You spent so many years dating a man who may or may not have loved you back (we all know he didn't love Skipper, just her boyfriend).  You've had over 80 careers.  You worked tirelessly as a doctor, an astronaut, a businesswoman, a police officer, a UNICEF volunteer, and an athlete (a World Cup soccer player, no less). You were a firefighter, the Princess of Ireland, and even a Presidential candidate.   You did all this and more all while maintaining a 39-23-33 figure. No wonder no one likes you anymore.

Barbie,  what you need is a transformation that rivals Sandy's from Grease. Remember sweet, demure Sandy?  By the end of the school year, she had discovered skin-tight leather, big hair, and really, really high heels.

Maybe that¹s all you need, but just in case that doesn't work out for you, here are a few tips to ensure you'll soon be popular once more.

• First off, ditch the Corvette for an Escalade. Make sure it has some
  24" wheels, too.  Tivo a few episodes of "Pimp My Ride" on MTV for ideas on
  getting yourself hooked up with some quality transportation every little
  girl would envy.
• You are straight-up loaded.  Buy yourself a first-class ticket to Italy and make a date to get some new threads made just for you.  I can't think of a single store that accommodates your measurements anyway.  Forget ready-to-wear ­ you need to be all about haute couture.  You were into it once, remember?  Versace, Dolce & Gabbana, Vera Wang ­ you wore it all. Remember how nice you looked then?
• Find yourself a new man, one who is ready to commit.  43 years of dating Ken and you never did make it to the altar.  Granted, marriage isn't for everyone, but we all know it's what you wanted.
• Let's be honest here.  The beginning of the end for you was your pal, the MC Hammer doll.  Maybe now you could share some new friends with the world ­ 50 Cent, Orlando Bloom, a couple of Backstreet BoysŠ You get where I'm going with this, don't you?  And by the way, I know you and Jude Law are tight as ticks, but let's not showcase that until this whole drama with the nanny dies down. You have enough image problems as it is.

If it doesn't work out, sugar, don't let it get you down.  You've done it all anyway.   Take some classes at the local community college.  Get back to
gardening.  Rediscover the joy of riding in your camper (if it still runs). Aging isn't easy, Barbie, but just think ­only 9 short years till you get your AARP card (and a great discount at the cafeteria).  Who needs popularity when you get that kind of recognition?

Live Out Loud

"LIVE OUT LOUD" my mother used to say.  Now we are living in Mexico!!!  Did she think I took that statement a bit too far?  Too late to turn back now.  We are in the throws of mariachi music, auto races with cattle in the middle of the road, no baby car seats (for the local folk….),  sombreros, great food, palm trees, sunshine almost every day, and espanol everywhere. 

After extensive research regarding my husband’s job opportunity and the medical services here in Cabo San Lucas, we jumped into the Mexican lifestyle.  Anticipation, doubt, excitement, fear, and curiosity were all parts of our moving process.  These same feelings would no doubt arise even with just a trip abroad with your child.

Abroad travel holds all sorts of questions especially when dealing with a one year old.  We chose to wait until after our son’s first birthday and 12 month shots to move him down to the Baja.  We have lived here in Mexico since February 2005.  We have been back to the states twice.  I will explore those trips with you soon.  Funny and educational travel ideas to come.

WHEW.  What a time in our lives.  Our little one, Christopher, handled the transition surprisingly well.  As a traveling parent, staying calm and taking it day by day proved priceless.  Little Groove Man lived out of the pack and play for several months until the "Mexican Move" AKA "Slow Move" had our crib here.  No big deal for him. Children are sturdy little creatures, bending and molding to new environments constantly.  At times I think we underestimate a child’s abilities to adapt.  New foods, new friends, new weather, new telephone numbers…all easily accepted by the one year old. 

Jump on in.  Don’t be afraid to travel abroad with your child, but my number one advice is to do your research.  Can you drink the water, what immunizations are needed for your particular country visit, what age is appropriate for what trip, what emergency facilities are there, those being just the beginning questions to ask.  Travel insurance is always a nice backup plan also.  Relatively speaking it is affordable to losing your entire trip cost.

We are prepared with this information for our children at home; just make sure to do the same preparedness when traveling outside of the country.

We miss you America, but we are learning what we can down here about our Mexican neighbors.  Enjoy your time with your bambinos and more to come soon from your Cabo Corner.  We hope to help you in your child traveling adventures.  Adios amigos.

Big Wheel and the Streaker

I don't feel very clever today.  I'm really struggling over here.  I keep sitting down to add on to what I've written and it's just not happening. Come to think of it, I could probably tell you why I'm NOT clever.  All from the past two days, too.

• Reid figured out how to turn the key in the lock, let himself out, and got on his big wheel in the driveway before I realized where he was (this took at most 30 seconds).
• Prior to this, Reid figured out that he could untangle himself from the safety belt in his high chair and stand up in the chair, thereby giving him great access to a countertop in the kitchen (above which lives our crystal goblets and 2 fish, among other things).  All this was accomplished as I was unloading the dishwasher five feet away.  Talk about quiet.
• Lilly pretended like she was Swiper the Fox and hid my shoes and my earrings. Found the earrings, have no clue where my shoes are.
• I neatly folded all of Reid's pants and put them in a drawer in his dresser.  He not-so-neatly opened up the drawer and threw them all over his room.
• Lilly very politely asked me for some fruit snacks, which she then took to her room and used to decorate.
• Lilly's friend Davis brought a box of crayons over.  Somehow said crayons ended up in my living room, and Reid got his paws on one and colored my coffee table.  Did I mention these crayons are not the washable kind?
• I took Lilly and Reid for a walk this afternoon with my friend Alison and her baby, Sam. Sam and Lilly were angels.  Reid threw a screaming fit for three-quarters of the walk.  Bonus:  we didn't surprise anyone in front of us.  They could all hear us from half a mile away.
• Reid figured out how to unscrew the cap on a bottle in our recycling bin. Outside.  Then he tried to drink the few drops of Fresca that remained in the bottle.  Not very sanitary, but better than the dog bowl.  I think.
• Our neighbor rang the doorbell right before bathtime to bring us some muffins she'd made.  I had stripped Reid down to a diaper when I heard the doorbell and ran to see who was there.  He chased after me, but only after he had ditched his diaper.  He streaked by my neighbor and her six-year-old, then hopped on his big wheel and tried to ride down the driveway.  Thank the lord it was dark and my next-door neighbors weren't home. 
• I'm starting to understand why my brain doesn't work very well.  I'm also starting to see that I sound like a deadbeat mother who doesn't pay attention to her ankle biters.   

- Carrie, loving mom to Lilly, 3.5 and Reid, 20 months